Leaving a semi-tamed baby sea dragon to guard the ship, Brantus, Captain of the Mermaids Tear, and his three hired henchwomen, Li the civilised barbarian, Ursula the Nature Witch, Archer the Archer, arrive at an island.
They go into an Inn and ask if anyone knows of anyone whose initials are T.N.
The locals think about it and suggest it might be the old necromancer from a few hundred years ago whose scary old lair is up on the hill over that way. When the old, old King found out about the necromancer doing evil magic, he sent some guards to kill him. The guards never came back.
The adventurers enter through a large stone double-door slightly ajar into a large, gloomy room.
There are groaning, moaning sounds coming out of the dark. Zombies!
Li charges toward the nearest zombie waving her greatsword around. The zombie knocks her out with one hit.
Archer shoots arrow over the unconscious Li through zombies head and pins it to the wall. The zombie body hangs from the wall by its forehead. The clunk of it hitting the wall makes two other zombies aware. They stagger from the gloom toward the adventurers.
Ursula moves between the zombies and another they hadn’t seen and casts her Life magic spell. The zombies turn to ash.
Archer and Brantus wake Li up. She is weak from being knocked out.
They go into the next room. There is nothing there. Flagstone tiles on the floor. Stone bricks for the walls. Stone ceiling.
“Well this is crap let’s go home.” Says Brantus.
“Not so fast!” Says the witch. “Let’s search the place first. There might be a secret door or lever.”
They do not find any such thing. What they do find is an engraving.
‘Narshal Lew Kalinargh Eeskinlew inchongerai’
They all take turns trying to pronounce the words. Then they have a short debate about whether that is four words of twenty four words.
“You know what we need?” Says Brantus. “We need an expert on ancient language to come here and have a look at this for us.”
“Or we could remember it and ask around.”
“What we need is a quill and ink set to copy it down.”
The witch interrupts. “Wait a minute, I think this is an ancient language I read about before. I recognise some of it.”
“Which bit?”
“The bit which reads right to left or the bit which reads left to right?”
“It says, ‘speak a ....dle and ... doo ... appear.”
“Speak a doodle and a doodle will appear. Simple. Genius. Thanks sister.”
Witch blushes.
“It might be speak a piddle and a doofer will appear.”
“If you piss in the room, a doohickey will appear. No somehow I don’t believe an ancient necromancer would’ve casting toilet spells to access his lair. Imagine the sorts of people he would have to be dealing with if that were the case.”
“Riddle?”
“Not now we’re busy trying to translate this, uh, ah ye that might be it.”
“Okay I know a riddle.”
They search the area again and suddenly hear an echo of a voice, say;
“What is very tall,
but doesn’t grow.
Taller than trees,
up up up it goes.”
Brantus looks embarrassed.
Luckily it’s dark so the women do not see what his mind is thinking of.
Luckily for all of them because an awkward silence as they all pause for thought.
“Where did that voice come from?” Asks Archer.
“I heard it too.”
“We all did.”
“Tall but doesn’t grow. Stairs?”
“The sky?”
They hold their torches up to examine the ceiling overhead.
“Stones?”
“A mountain!” Says Li.
All of a sudden the wall moves.
With a scary grinding sound.
A long tunnel is revealed directly opposite the entrance.
“Well now we’ve done it.”
“You go first.” Orders Brantus.
A small square room with another doorway not quite opposite.
A tunnel which bends to the right and then to the left and then quickly to the right and left again and straight ahead.
Two more zombies.
Archer shoots one through the head and pins it to the wall the same as the last time.
Brantus charges forward and sees another zombie which was hiding in the dark. He decapitates the zombie he had charged at.
Behind the zombies is a tunnel with an offshoot to the left and a small room at the far end.
Li runs over to attack the third zombie with her greatsword. The zombie is split down its middle into two relatively equal size pieces.
Li wipes her sword clean on the zombie rags while Archer retrieved her arrow. The zombie slumps to the ground.
The offshoot tunnel has a door at the end.
Brantus instructs Li and Archer to search the small room. They find a magic staff of destruction. It has ‘magic staff of destruction’ engraved on it along with instructions for use. ‘You hold it, you charge it up, and a firebolt shoots out of its tip.’
“Hm. Useful.” Says everybody.
Because Li is injured and also has the highest Brawn score when she is not inhured, the party decide she can carry it for now.
The party open the door and find themselves directly opposite another door with a very long tunnel wide enough for two people to stand side by side, on their right, disappearing into darkness.
“Open that door.” Says Brantus.
Li opens the door with Archer to her right, Brantus behind her, Ursula to his right.
A small room with three zombies. A zombie knocks Li out again. She falls into Brantus who falls over underneath her.
“Shut that door!” Says Brantus.
Archer shoots the zombie with her hardwood bow. The arrow goes through its head, knocks it back, the arrow goes through a zombies head behind it, both of them are pinned to the wall, dead.
“Nice shot!” Says Ursula. Ursula shuts the door.
Brantus stands up. “Not sure if our civilised barbarian is all she’s cut out to be. That’s twice she’s fallen asleep on duty in the last... how long have we been in here anyway?”
Ursula casts healing magic on Li. Li wakes up feeling refreshed.
The zombie pulls at the door from its side of the door to open it. Ursula pulls on the from her side of the door to shut it. The door flies open and smacks into Ursula who falls over.
Archer shoots the zombie and misses.
Li charges at the zombie with her greatsword held out like a spear. The zombie dodges her attack and whacks her as she passes.
Ursula gets up.
Brantus says “Do something!”
Archer says “What does it look like we’re doing?”
Zombie hits Li with its axe. Li up-slashes the zombie diagonally with her greatsword, kills it.
Ursula casts healing in Li, again.
The party moves up the long corridor. At the far end is a door with an eye. They hear a voice again.
“Speak the answer to the riddle and you may enter.”
“Mountain!” Says Brantus.
The door opens. Behind it is a massive badass Lair of the Necromancer main worship room. There is a necromancer standing in a stone circle in the middle of the room, meditating in the lotus position while floating one foot in the air.
“Excuse me sir, you wouldn’t have happened to have seen any necromancers around here would you?” Asks Brantus.
“Why have you come into my home, destroyed my people, barged in and interrupted my meditation?” Asks the floating necromancer.
“We are looking for a necromancer whose name begins T.N. who sent us a message.”
“I have been awaiting your arrival.” He stops floating and turns around for them to see he is a skeleton.
Ursula gets ready her Life Spell to try and destroy the foul undead creature.
“Before you do anything rash, I want to tell you, I know about the ring and the trident. I can teach you how to use your new weapons. You must do only one favour for me. Retrieve my body from the sacred barrow of the south.”
“Okay.” Says Brantus.
“I shall be awaiting you. Farewell.” The necromancer disappears into thin air.
All of a sudden they are back at the tavern!
As they materialise they hear his voice say, “I shall be watching you!”
“Hey, we didn’t even get a chance to raid his workshop!” Complains Li.
“Are we going to do his mission?” Asks Archer.
“I’m going to have a drink.” Says Brantus. He orders a round of drinks from the bar.
End of Quest Three
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